Heavy Graces

by Allison Crowe

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1.
Through These Heavy Graces Composed by Allison Crowe I’m not better than anyone and you’re no better than me So here we stand at the artifice face-to-face in symmetry I laugh when I’m afraid and I cry when taken by peace I shake through new beginnings and I scream when I release I want to breathe but I can’t catch breath I want to live but I can’t shake death And bathe in light in the darkest of places Tread lightly through these heavy graces Guilt crawls through my skin and exits every pore I exist a floating creature of heart and bones, so sore But you stand firm in faith for your emptiness of soul And I’m left here with the shaking when laughter takes its toll I want to breathe But I can’t catch breath I want to live but I can’t shake death Bathe in light in the darkest of places Tread lightly through these heavy graces And shadow takes his cover It’s piercing with his eyes No moral lesson learned here No clever compromise Just feign of retribution and tears swallowed ill at ease To wash the scars from inside this doubt will not appease I want to breathe but I can’t catch breath I want to live but I can’t shake death And bathe in light in the darkest of places Tread lightly through these heavy graces I want to breathe but I can’t catch breath I want to live but I can’t shake death And bathe in light in the darkest of places Tread lightly through these heavy graces Tread lightly through these heavy graces Tread lightly through these, these heavy graces
2.
Famous Blue Raincoat Composed by Leonard Cohen As Performed by Allison Crowe It's four in the morning, the end of December I'm writing you now just to see if you're better New York is cold, but I like where I'm living There's music on Clinton Street all through the evening I hear that you're building your little house deep in the desert You're living for nothing now I hope you're keeping some kind of record Yes, and Jane came by with a lock of your hair She said that you gave it to her that night that you planned to go clear Did you ever go clear? Ah, the last time we saw you - you looked so much older Your famous blue raincoat was torn at the shoulder You'd been to the station to meet every train and you came home without Lili Marlene And you treated my woman to a flake of your life And when she came back she was nobody's wife Well, I see you there with the rose in your teeth One more thin gypsy thief Well, I see Jane's awake She sends her regards And what can I tell you my brother, my killer What can I possibly say? I guess that I miss you, I guess I forgive you I'm glad you stood in my way If you ever come by here for Jane or for me, your enemy is sleeping and his woman is free Yes, and thanks for the trouble you took from her eyes I thought it was there for good so I never tried Yes, and Jane came by with a lock of your hair She said that you gave it to her on the night that you tried to go clear Did you ever go clear?
3.
You All Haunt Me Composed by Allison Crowe I would take it back if it was even real I would tell you how exactly how I feel And it would be ugly and you would be scared Can’t you see my face? Oh can you hear my voice? Now, how can you tell me that this is a choice, that I asked for this? Now, why would I do that? When this is all I have and this is all I am You haunt me, you all haunt me Now, if you think that I forgot if you think that I moved on I ask you - have you even met me? what planet are you on? I don't forget anything even though I try Maybe too intense maybe too revealed maybe madness baby but you’re so, so concealed I never saw a thing This is all I have and this is all I am You haunt me, you all haunt me Why did I do this? Why did I say that? and why did you pretend to care when I know that you were watching me cry yeah, you watched me die When light circled my eyes and my heart tried to leave me My words were all gone wild not even I could believe me any more you have to know that I tried And this is all I have This is all I am You haunt me, yeah, you haunt me You haunt me Yeah, you all haunt me
4.
Words 03:12 video
Words Composed by Allison Crowe I'll sit here and I'll ruminate My thoughts do not discriminate There are tears behind my mouth If I open they'll fall out Breathe deeply, reign it in again My patience it is growing thin If I open up my mouth it'll all fall out And all it takes is words And all I taste is blood And all I see is blinding light Now I can't breathe I am so angry I can't breathe A flash of darkness supersedes And I try to reach you through the reeds and the pitfalls of myself I am becoming someone else I do not know the way back dear Oh, you will find no answers here More questions than you wanted will leave you cold and haunted And all it takes is words And all I taste is blood And all I see is blinding light And I can't breathe I am so angry I can't breathe I cannot breathe I am so angry I’m so angry I can’t breathe And I can’t breathe I’m so angry I can’t breathe
5.
Better Man Composed by Eddie Vedder As Performed by Allison Crowe Waiting, watching the clock, it's four o'clock, it's got to stop Tell him, take no more, she practices her speech as he opens the door, she rolls over pretends to sleep as he looks her over She lies and says she's in love with him, can't find a better man She dreams in colour, she dreams in red, can't find a better man Oh... Talkin' to herself, there's no one else who needs to know she tells herself, oh Memories back when she was bold and strong and waiting for the world to come along She swears she knew it, now she swears he's gone She lies and says she's in love with him, can't find a better man She dreams in colour, she dreams in red, can't find a better man She lies and says she still loves him, can't find a better man She dreams in colour, she dreams in red, can't find a better man Can't find a better man Can't find a better man She loved him, oh, she don't want to be this way She feeds him, oh, that's why she'll be back again Can't find a better man Can't find a better man Can't find a better man Can't find a better man... Oh oh oh oh oh... Ah ah...
6.
Control 02:28 video
Control Composed by Allison Crowe At the end of the road there is nowhere to go and if I fell I could at least claw my way upwards And I know when I'm right and I feel when it's real but I still feel myself walking backward I could hold on to these memories or I could let go but I would still not feel in control of my soul Are these thoughts in my head? are these toes in my bed? And can I feel anything or am I cold? Do I have all the time in the world - is it mine? Am I just getting started or am I growing old? And I could hold on to these memories or I could let go but I would still not feel in control of my soul Well, hello tomorrow I see you're cleverly disguised as yesterday today And if you don't mind I have so much to leave behind I don't need anything I'll leave my bags with you and walk away And I could hold on to these memories or I could let go but I would still not feel in control of my soul And I have held on to these memories It's time to let go And I am next in line to take back control of my soul to take back control of my soul to take back control of my soul
7.
Dissolve 03:06 video
Dissolve Composed by Allison Crowe Outside the day is waking In my body the earth is quaking But I sit so still and silent You can barely hear me shake And icy hands hold on with a death grip to my conscience I could shatter it again But the base will never break And at the end of the light I will call to you Yes, at the start of the night I will picture you, too And I will see the dark dissolve to nothing And I will breathe again I sit with open eyes And I lay with wandering mind And there are shadows on the wall And their lies are never kind But I could never sleep right The day is my rest for wakeful nights I shiver and release and I feel my fears decease And at the end of the light I will call to you Yes, at the start of the night I will picture you, too And I will see the dark dissolve to nothing And I will breathe again And it shouldn't hurt so bad to open up my eyes Sometimes it just does, don't know why, but it just does. And at the end of the light I will call to you Yes, at the start of the night I will picture you, too And I will see the dark dissolve to nothing And I will breathe again And at the end of the light I will call to you Yes, at the start of the night I will picture you, too And I will see the dark dissolve to nothing And I will breathe again And I will breathe again And I will breathe again
8.
Famous Blue Raincoat Composed by Leonard Cohen As Performed by Allison Crowe It's four in the morning, the end of December I'm writing you now just to see if you're better New York is cold, but I like where I'm living There's music on Clinton Street all through the evening I hear that you're building your little house deep in the desert You're living for nothing now I hope you're keeping some kind of record Yes, and Jane came by with a lock of your hair She said that you gave it to her that night that you planned to go clear Did you ever go clear? Ah, the last time we saw you - you looked so much older Your famous blue raincoat was torn at the shoulder You'd been to the station to meet every train and you came home without Lili Marlene And you treated my woman to a flake of your life And when she came back she was nobody's wife Well, I see you there with the rose in your teeth One more thin gypsy thief Well, I see Jane's awake She sends her regards And what can I tell you my brother, my killer What can I possibly say? I guess that I miss you, I guess I forgive you I'm glad you stood in my way If you ever come by here for Jane or for me, your enemy is sleeping and his woman is free Yes, and thanks for the trouble you took from her eyes I thought it was there for good so I never tried Yes, and Jane came by with a lock of your hair She said that you gave it to her on the night that you tried to go clear Did you ever go clear?

about

“Heavy Graces” is a new song set from Allison Crowe - and with this collection she’s writing, singing, playing piano, guitar, doing percussion, engineering and production, album art, photography – and, for the first-time ever, adding fiddle to her palette!

“Heavy Graces”, an album which includes new songs from the pen and soul of Allison Crowe, alongside her interpretations of tunes composed by Leonard Cohen and Pearl Jam’s Eddie Vedder, is released October 15, 2013.

Happy Thanksgiving – from Canada!!

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released October 15, 2013

Allison Crowe - voice, piano, guitar, percussion, fiddle, engineer, producer, arranger, photographer, art director - and, well, everything that's on this record :)

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Allison Crowe Corner Brook, Newfoundland and Labrador

"Why music?" "Why breathing?"

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